It's been a little over month since Tien passed. I was back for her memorial service and too many surreal moments, too many tears but a lot of laughter as well. No 'ah-ha' realizations or wanting a drastic change; its to continue living the best life possible and be happy.
I can't explain grieving -- we each handle it differently and a part of me still hasn't accepted that she's gone. I think of her every day, wondering what she's up to, what she's eating, where she's vacationing and then I catch myself and remember that that is just wishful thinking.
Tien left a list of bucket list items that we're ticking off one by one. It's mostly food items and one hot air balloon ride that I'm planning to do for her within this year.
I miss you friend.
Moving forward but not moving on.
Tuesday, July 23, 2019
Tuesday, April 02, 2019
SURGE!
My friend, Andrew, whom I refer to as Campus Creeper, introduced me to Bitcoin early last year. He's an early adopter and made his fair share when BC was still in the early stages. When BC got below $7K, he sent me a note and said it was good time to invest. I took to his words and bought $500 worth + another $500 by default + another $600 for luck (AKA greed). What I didn't know was that BC is like playing the stocks (which I don't do).
Buy low, sell high!
I thought it was a long term investment and idiotically and optimistically waited for it to hit $19K again. Oh, what a fool I was/am. Throughout the months, when I should have sold, I waited and when I did sell, it went back up the following week. After 6 months of BC toying with my emotions and me checking the app every 5 mins, like a tween, pining for a return text, I was down $946.40. I could've gotten a new phone with that cash.
Anyway, the surge is happening now and I just couldn't resist. I checked yesterday and the price was around $4k, today at lunch was $4.6K (which made me antsy to buy) and after lunch, it went up to $4.8K. I bit the bullet and used the remaining $653.60 and bought BC.
Yes, I am somewhat still greedy, but mostly hoping to just break even. But learnings from the past have me worried that the surge will plateau soon and BC will go back to $4K. I hate BC. It's a toxic friend I have yet learned to drop.
But for now, surge, baby, surge!
Buy low, sell high!
I thought it was a long term investment and idiotically and optimistically waited for it to hit $19K again. Oh, what a fool I was/am. Throughout the months, when I should have sold, I waited and when I did sell, it went back up the following week. After 6 months of BC toying with my emotions and me checking the app every 5 mins, like a tween, pining for a return text, I was down $946.40. I could've gotten a new phone with that cash.
Anyway, the surge is happening now and I just couldn't resist. I checked yesterday and the price was around $4k, today at lunch was $4.6K (which made me antsy to buy) and after lunch, it went up to $4.8K. I bit the bullet and used the remaining $653.60 and bought BC.
Yes, I am somewhat still greedy, but mostly hoping to just break even. But learnings from the past have me worried that the surge will plateau soon and BC will go back to $4K. I hate BC. It's a toxic friend I have yet learned to drop.
But for now, surge, baby, surge!
Thursday, March 14, 2019
It is what it is
Since the last entry (back in 2016), I can thankfully say Taobao was not the end of me.
Don't get me wrong, TB is on my frenemy list, but my lackluster desire to accumulate crap is my ultimate savior.
Its been a month since CNY holiday and I'm still learning how to process and deal with the fact that my dear friend of 25+ years has stage 4 lung cancer. I wasn't expecting the on and off flood of emotions -- anger, sadness, not knowing what to do or say, but mostly just anger. I've been trying to figure out the root of the anger, but so far, I have no answers.
I've been purposely anti social and avoiding people/the topic whenever possible as it is my preferred method of coping with things. I did find some solace in talking with the circle of friends from high school and for brief moments, break free of the dark and twisty monotonous bubble I've been in.
2nd treatment is coming up along with a not so great update. It is what it is.
Fuck cancer.
Don't get me wrong, TB is on my frenemy list, but my lackluster desire to accumulate crap is my ultimate savior.
Its been a month since CNY holiday and I'm still learning how to process and deal with the fact that my dear friend of 25+ years has stage 4 lung cancer. I wasn't expecting the on and off flood of emotions -- anger, sadness, not knowing what to do or say, but mostly just anger. I've been trying to figure out the root of the anger, but so far, I have no answers.
I've been purposely anti social and avoiding people/the topic whenever possible as it is my preferred method of coping with things. I did find some solace in talking with the circle of friends from high school and for brief moments, break free of the dark and twisty monotonous bubble I've been in.
2nd treatment is coming up along with a not so great update. It is what it is.
Fuck cancer.
Wednesday, February 17, 2016
Taobao!!
Taobao will be the root of my demise.
Bought a foam roller + lacrosse ball. Both were highly recommendation by Colin to stretch out the muscles. Words can't describe how excited I am -- for a foam roller.
Happy 2016!
Bought a foam roller + lacrosse ball. Both were highly recommendation by Colin to stretch out the muscles. Words can't describe how excited I am -- for a foam roller.
Happy 2016!
Sunday, June 28, 2015
In Case Of An Emergency...
I have this friend, "Lulu", that I met almost 10 years ago in Taipei. Lulu's life is anything but dull -- there are Gossip Girl components mixed with Fight Club plus a touch of Young & Dangerous (Cantonese movie) tidbits. I'm a bystander in most of the scenarios; an avid listener, tuning in whenever something has come up/happened and always in awe of the shit that goes on and the life people create in this bubble.
Lulu, throughout the years, has bailed me out of numerous sticky situations, without hesitation and judgement. Every. Single. Fucking. Time. I've come to rely on her and it feels a bit selfish on my end, but her track record of coming through is just impeccable. She tells me not to worry, not to think too much and if I must think, to think happy thoughts. I want to punch her in the face whenever she says it, but I know she's right.
She is my "in case of emergency" person. And loan shark, I owe her like a bazillion dollars. She's also family -- which means she's one of the few that's able to tolerate my many dramatic episodes and I of hers. So this post is dedicated to the one and only Lulu. I am down for a lifetime of bad relationships, rescue calls, bitch slaps, duck clubs, chicken clubs, flipping houses, business ventures, meat on a stick and more.
MONGA.
Lulu, throughout the years, has bailed me out of numerous sticky situations, without hesitation and judgement. Every. Single. Fucking. Time. I've come to rely on her and it feels a bit selfish on my end, but her track record of coming through is just impeccable. She tells me not to worry, not to think too much and if I must think, to think happy thoughts. I want to punch her in the face whenever she says it, but I know she's right.
She is my "in case of emergency" person. And loan shark, I owe her like a bazillion dollars. She's also family -- which means she's one of the few that's able to tolerate my many dramatic episodes and I of hers. So this post is dedicated to the one and only Lulu. I am down for a lifetime of bad relationships, rescue calls, bitch slaps, duck clubs, chicken clubs, flipping houses, business ventures, meat on a stick and more.
MONGA.
Tuesday, April 07, 2015
8:30AM
In a scenic town called Yang Shuo that's around a 2 hour bus ride south of Guilin.
I like small town feels.
I like the rolling mountains as the backdrop.
I like the sound of the rain falling as I'm sitting on the roof top, drinking my 3 in 1 insta coffee.
I like that I can hear the birds chirping.
I like the ease and comfort of new friends on this trip.
I like how the insta coffee is working and I'll be making doo-doo soon.
I like..
I like small town feels.
I like the rolling mountains as the backdrop.
I like the sound of the rain falling as I'm sitting on the roof top, drinking my 3 in 1 insta coffee.
I like that I can hear the birds chirping.
I like the ease and comfort of new friends on this trip.
I like how the insta coffee is working and I'll be making doo-doo soon.
I like..
Sunday, March 29, 2015
"Hey you guys!"
I went camping last weekend.
The above sentence, though true to every word, failed to capture what really went down the 2.5 days out on the road, away from the city. Nothing scandalous or dramatic happened. On contrary, it was a weekend adventure Spielberg himself would be proud of.
Sure, the first night in a questionable motel somewhere in Hangzhou wasn't quite roughing it, but after a 3 hour bus ride and arriving past midnight on a cold, rainy Friday night/Saturday we were happy NOT to be in a tent. Katie and I got rooms on the top floor (ballers, holler) and it was a room with a squatter toilet + 4 beds. Anyway, it was suffice to say we passed out right away.
8AM breakfast -- before I write about breakfast, the plaster on the ceiling fell on me in the wee hours. Plus, we were idiots and forgot to turn on the heat. So even though we were indoors, it felt like the great outdoors. I noticed Katie had put on all her clothes/jackets as she emerged from her sleeping bag of a cocoon. Back to breakfast. The tour group said western style breakfast -- toast with PB &J does not constitute as a western breakfast, but whatever. I 'heart' PB&J.
10:30am. How many blondes does it take to set up a tent? Apparently just 1 Italian guy.
12pm. We rappelled 50 metres (estimate) over a cliff into a cave. Took a good 3 hours for everyone to make a go. 2 things to highlight during rappelling. 1) Lady in white sweat pants defied all odds and kept her fuckin white ass sweat pants dirt free. 2) Food truck lady and her not so reliable husband. They both went down the cliff together, she was scared shitless and her husband just scurried past her to get to the bottom. Big time douche.
3pm. Underground caves. Lady in white pants managed to keep herself dry and dirt free. She either had 3 pairs of the same pants or she's a magician.
6pm. BBQ + lanterns + campfire.
11pm. 3 little pigs in a tent. No ghost stories, unless you count the "I killed a man" story from Kristen, which isn't worth repeating.
7am. Cue "Circle of Life". Yes, that's Kristen's alarm and it was quite fitting as the sun was shining and a million fuckin birds were chirping.
10am. After breakfast, we went to a new location to explore more underground caves. But this time, it was straight out of Goonies. No safety harnesses or gear, it was just a pair of revolutionary made shoes (with holes), 1 flashlight and our wits. It took 2 hours (maybe more) to trek down and circle back, but the last leg of the excursion was the most memorable.
Imagine yourself 50 yards below the ground, in caves that not many people have had the luxury to explore. Makeshift ladders made of bamboo/steel and a rope to guide you further down into the cave. Imagine a body of water, a rickety bamboo raft and a waterfall at the other end. Yes, we had to hop onto the raft (2 at a time), pull ourselves across the body of water, hop onto the ledge and climb up the mother fuckin water fall (it was like a 30 feet vertical climb). All this in the dark, without a safety harness or anything. Its a testament of what we can achieve when we're put to the test. Spielberg would be proud -- heck, I'm proud of us and thankful no one had gotten hurt.
Lady in white sweat pants was still lady in WHITE sweat pants.
4pm. One last hike to get to the bus. After hiking for an hour or so, we came upon a cliff and had to walk down. This one wasn't too bad. Down the cliff and another hour or so hike later, we finally made it to the bus. It was a great end to a great weekend adventure.
10pm. Back to the city.
The above sentence, though true to every word, failed to capture what really went down the 2.5 days out on the road, away from the city. Nothing scandalous or dramatic happened. On contrary, it was a weekend adventure Spielberg himself would be proud of.
Sure, the first night in a questionable motel somewhere in Hangzhou wasn't quite roughing it, but after a 3 hour bus ride and arriving past midnight on a cold, rainy Friday night/Saturday we were happy NOT to be in a tent. Katie and I got rooms on the top floor (ballers, holler) and it was a room with a squatter toilet + 4 beds. Anyway, it was suffice to say we passed out right away.
8AM breakfast -- before I write about breakfast, the plaster on the ceiling fell on me in the wee hours. Plus, we were idiots and forgot to turn on the heat. So even though we were indoors, it felt like the great outdoors. I noticed Katie had put on all her clothes/jackets as she emerged from her sleeping bag of a cocoon. Back to breakfast. The tour group said western style breakfast -- toast with PB &J does not constitute as a western breakfast, but whatever. I 'heart' PB&J.
10:30am. How many blondes does it take to set up a tent? Apparently just 1 Italian guy.
12pm. We rappelled 50 metres (estimate) over a cliff into a cave. Took a good 3 hours for everyone to make a go. 2 things to highlight during rappelling. 1) Lady in white sweat pants defied all odds and kept her fuckin white ass sweat pants dirt free. 2) Food truck lady and her not so reliable husband. They both went down the cliff together, she was scared shitless and her husband just scurried past her to get to the bottom. Big time douche.
3pm. Underground caves. Lady in white pants managed to keep herself dry and dirt free. She either had 3 pairs of the same pants or she's a magician.
6pm. BBQ + lanterns + campfire.
11pm. 3 little pigs in a tent. No ghost stories, unless you count the "I killed a man" story from Kristen, which isn't worth repeating.
7am. Cue "Circle of Life". Yes, that's Kristen's alarm and it was quite fitting as the sun was shining and a million fuckin birds were chirping.
10am. After breakfast, we went to a new location to explore more underground caves. But this time, it was straight out of Goonies. No safety harnesses or gear, it was just a pair of revolutionary made shoes (with holes), 1 flashlight and our wits. It took 2 hours (maybe more) to trek down and circle back, but the last leg of the excursion was the most memorable.
Imagine yourself 50 yards below the ground, in caves that not many people have had the luxury to explore. Makeshift ladders made of bamboo/steel and a rope to guide you further down into the cave. Imagine a body of water, a rickety bamboo raft and a waterfall at the other end. Yes, we had to hop onto the raft (2 at a time), pull ourselves across the body of water, hop onto the ledge and climb up the mother fuckin water fall (it was like a 30 feet vertical climb). All this in the dark, without a safety harness or anything. Its a testament of what we can achieve when we're put to the test. Spielberg would be proud -- heck, I'm proud of us and thankful no one had gotten hurt.
Lady in white sweat pants was still lady in WHITE sweat pants.
4pm. One last hike to get to the bus. After hiking for an hour or so, we came upon a cliff and had to walk down. This one wasn't too bad. Down the cliff and another hour or so hike later, we finally made it to the bus. It was a great end to a great weekend adventure.
10pm. Back to the city.
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