Harvard Test

1 = 5
2 = 25
3 = 125
4 = 625
5 =?

I guess this question was part of the Harvard entrance exam.
Can you guess what 5 equals?

Office Space

I watched Office Space today. Holy shit!!! It sure hit the mark~ I've only been working a month, but my everyday is exactly like the movie. How am I going to survive? =P

August Blues~

I had another weird dream last nite.

I was driving somewhere and I called up Matt LeBlanc--only I couldn't remember his name, so I called him "Joey". I was confirming our plans for later and he teased me about not remember his name.

I then pull up to a spa like place to meet up with someone. I'm not sure who I'm suppose to meet with until Courtney Cox flags me down! So we chat for a bit and Jennifer Aniston joins us!! She's still sad over her divorce and gained a lil weight (ok, a lot of weight). So Courtney and I are doing the sympathetic head tilt while she grieves and we see Brad Pitt about to walk in door! (glass doors) He's holding hands with Jennifer Garner (weird how it wasn't Angelina Jolie) and Jennifer Aniston starts to weep while Courtney gives him the evil eye.

I sensed the upcoming tension, so I get up, walk towards the door, grab his arm and lead him away before all hell breaks loose. I guide him upstairs to a hidden room where a room full of wannabe thugs are playing poker and I make Brad get in on the game.

I go back downstairs and Courtney Cox turns into Roseanne Bar!! And she's pissed at me for leading Brad away so she starts chasing me in the spa and I wake up.

Talk about weird~~

I had my first English class last Saturday. 3 people showed up and we went to a nearby coffee shop for some afternoon tea. The company picked up the tab. My co-workers then came over to play mah jong, cards and eat, eat, eat. The last 4 left the apt around 4:30am. Felt a lot like college--sad thing is, I'm still recovering! And I didn't even drink. *chuckle chuckle* I ain't 18 no more!

If I must...

THREE NAMES YOU GO BY:
1. Nancy
2. Mah Jong Nazi
3. NJ Star

THREE SCREEN NAMES YOU HAVE HAD:
1. Nancy: '-------'
2. see above
3. so i'm not very creative--sue me.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My teeny, tiny eyes
2. My fat ass--tho my ass is fat, I've been complimented many a times by intoxicated guys at the clubs. go me?!
3. My abs of steel, which without Winsor Pilates, would still be flabby.

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS YOU DON'T LIKE ABOUT YOURSELF:
1. My height- I'm 5'3 but I want to be 5'5
2. My legs--I want Kei's legs.
3. The fact that I have to shave everyday annoys me.

THREE THINGS THAT SCARE YOU:
1. Creepy old men
2. Taiwanese fashion
3. Things that go bump in the nite

THREE OF YOUR EVERYDAY ESSENTIALS:
1. Coffee
2. MSN Gossip column
3. Fine--reading Astri's blog.

THREE THINGS YOU ARE WEARING RIGHT NOW:
1. White polo shirt
2. Capri khakis --Casual Friday!
3. My work ID card

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE BANDS OR MUSICAL ARTISTS:
1. Sammi Cheng
2. Anything hip-hoppy---I like em dirrrrty songs =P
3. See above

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE SONGS:
1. Baby got back - Sir Mix Alot
2. Hope - Faith Evans/Twista
3. Hold you down - J.Lo/Fat Joe

THREE THINGS YOU WANT IN A RELATIONSHIP:
1. Great sex
2. see above
3. that's all

2 TRUTHS 1 LIE:
1. I can stuff 30+ grapes in my mouth
2. I can only remember the swear words in other languages
3. I scaled the Himalaylas and had dim sum with the Dali Lama

THREE PHYSICAL THINGS ABOUT THE PREFERRED SEX THAT APPEAL TO YOU:
1. Clean cut hair style
2. Pearly white teeth (preferably straight)
3. As long as the guy is taller/weighs more/older than me--it's all good!

THREE OF YOUR FAVORITE HOBBIES:
1. Shooting hoops
2. Road trips
3. Mah jong!

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO REALLY BADLY RIGHT NOW:
1. Eat a double decker from Taco Bell!!
2. Take a dump
3. Streak in the office

THREE CAREERS YOU'RE CONSIDERING/YOU'VE CONSIDERED:
1. FBI agent
2. Professional House/Apt sitter
3. Chef

THREE PLACES YOU WANT TO GO ON VACATION:
1. Greece
2. Egypt
3. Great Wall of China

THREE THINGS YOU WANT TO DO BEFORE YOU DIE:
1. Be an advocate for World Peace
2. Backpack throughout Europe/Africa and S.America
3. Win the Noble Prize for bringing peace on earth

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A BOY:
1. I like sports
2. When I see a girl cry, I get the hell outta there!
3. I am a pervert

THREE WAYS THAT YOU ARE STEREOTYPICALLY A GIRL:
1. I shriek when I see a cockroach/spider in the room
2. I cried in Armaggedon
3. I love Sex & The City.

THREE MALE CELEB CRUSHES:
1. Brad Pitt
2. Colin Farrell
3. Daniel Wu (hong kong actor)

THREE PEOPLE THAT I WOULD LIKE TO SEE TAKE THIS QUIZ NOW:
1. Josh!!
2. Danny!!
3. Cathy!!! since you don't have a blog, email it!

The city

I love walking in Taipei. The place is cramped with sky scrapers, cars, subways, buses, scooters, street vendors, shops, etc. that walking around is the best way to explore.

Whenever I take the bus/ride my bike to work, I always think of a scene from "You've Got Mail". It's in the beginning where Meg Ryan walks the streets of New York to her bookstore. As she walks, stores are opening, people are heading to Starbucks to get their morning coffee--its like watching the city wake up. Can't really get that feeling in Taipei--just the crazy morning rush and after work traffic.

But with the yin there is a yang. The night is here is amazing. Besides the fact that there's too many things to do to list, just by looking down Zhong Xiao E. Rd is a treat in itself. I guess its safe to say that Taiwanese people are more nite owls than morning people.

I can't wait for the weather to get cooler. I learned 1 valueable lesson this past month. And that is: no mascara during the summer months in Taiwan. I'm always mistaken for a high schooler here, so for work, I would wear make up--nothing fancy. But with the walking and the sweating and the long hours, I would literally look like a panda by the end of the day. Plus, I once poked myself in the eye with a qtip while trying to wipe it off. I stopped applying mascara the next morning. Lesson learned the hard way.

In & out

I think I've caught Astri's maniacal blogging obsession! ^__^

I remember talking to Heather on the phone about 2 months ago. I called cuz I had accepted a job offer at a import/export company and thought I would have the income to make the international call. I tried to sound excited about the job, but it wasn't something to gush about.

In the conversation, Heather saying how her job (she's in pr) wasn't fulfilling-- in the sense that what she was doing wasn't saving lives or making a positive impact. Now that I'm in advertising, I'm starting to wondering that as well. If y'all didn't know, I'm advertising tobacco ( I know, I'm going straight to hell).

The advertising process is fun. I work closely with the creative team that designs the ads, meet with suppliers that manufactures the samples and relay info to the client. There's always something to do and to learn, but the whole tobacco thing is getting to me. I can't help but think, "shit, I'm advertising a product that kills. wtf is wrong with me?" Is it really worth it to stick to it after trying so hard to get in? So much for having morals or principles eh?

I know I should be more open-minded, but everytime I look at my LIVESTRONG bracelet, the word 'hypocrite' screams back at me. All I can say right now is 'in & out'.

Too much time?

I'm typing away in Janet/Amanda's room and as I look around, I'm noticing 5 different clocks! There's 3 by the bed, 1 on the desk and 1 hanging on the wall. If you count my laptop and cell phone, that's 7! clocks in a tiny space. Interesting...

I have too much time on my hands. Ha-ha-ha.. (pat on the back)

Sunday

Alice invited me to her friends bday shinding earlier and at first I was a bit hesitant to go... I still had food coma from dinner and was suprisingly gassy. But I decided to stop by and meet new people--and boy did I!

All the people that I met are taking classes at ShiDa and it was really nice to finally relax and enjoy the scene.

Games

People at work love to play games. I guess its their way of bonding. We went bowling couple weeks ago and the new trend is playing "big old two" before the weekend. My kind of people!

I met up with Grace couple days ago to pick up some stuff she brought from the states. I was hoping for some juicy gossip, but alas, all I got was a sympathetic shrug of the shoulders. Next time, next time....

I will be starting my 4th week at Batey this coming Monday--time sure flies! I'm still trying to learn the basic lingos and procedures, but some days, I feel like a complete idiot and can't understand a lick of what they're trying to tell me. That's not ADD right?

I officially moved into the apt with Alice and Moe. I'm actually a part-time roommate still. 4 days there and 3 days with grandma. Amanda went back to the states yesterday and won't be back till end of September. Gee, I wish I could visit the states. I'm still craving Taco Bell!!!! And at this moment--KFC! Must be that time of the month coming up. Sigh~

Typhoon Part Deux

So we had another typhoon last friday (8/5). Wasn't as bad as the first one and I welcomed the day off from work. But with good things, there's always a catch. I have to do a presentation on Monday so my weekend will be spent researching the Taiwan Tobacco Market. I feel like I'm back in Raven's class...

We did a mass cleaning of the apt yesterday and even rearranged the furniture. I do like the new set up--it reminds me of the "Friends" set. The apt is manifested with these little bugs and we can't figure out where they're coming from! Pain in the ass. AND, when we were cleaning Moe's food, we found another species of bugs! I think the apt is too moist, plus we have carpet so its easier for bugs to multiple. Oh gosh, I'm living in a bug's nest!

I had the oddest dream last nite. I was being hunted down by a robot from the future! Yes, it does sound like a cheap "the terminator" rip off, but I actually woke up when the robot caught me! Funky--I wonder what it means!! Seeing that I couldn't sleep, I decided to brew some coffee and make some good ol fashion american style banana pancakes for breakfast. Too bad we don't have bacon, that would've made it 100% perfecto! Man, I miss IHOP!

Work is work. I'm still trying to fit in and its taking longer than expected. Sometimes I wish there was another ABC or foreigner in the office. Bah~

"light bulb"

I'm a big fan of this Taiwanese talk show called "kan xi lai le". Todays rerun had 5 local models as guests. One of them looked strangely familiar... I kept thinking to myself, "have I met her before?"... then it hit me!

A month ago I had written an entry about a Chinese Angelina Jolie lookalike--I think they're related! They have to be sisters (the big goldfish eyes--uncanny!). I mean, they both have the same last name and its an uncommon one. Plus, they're both freakishly tall for a Taiwanese. Haha--so funny. The Chinese Angelina is an AD at Pubilicis--has to be in her late 20's to be an AD... The model on tv is a year younger than me. I'm just laughing at my thinking process. *chuckle chuckle*

Other than my absurd way of entertaining myself, I lasted 5 full days at Batey! Go me! The work is fun--but a lot of shit to learn. I know I'm going to get 'lectured' in the upcoming weeks. >__<"

I made a visit to this club called Room 18 last nite. They have a new location and its just HUGE! Very swanky inside. I didn't dance much nor drink. I was just in awe at the club scene. Sure reminded me of the days I used to teach English. I gotta say tho, Taiwanese guys sure groove to a 'different' kind of beat. I did notice that a lot of the local girls are getting freaky deaky with each other. Felt like I was watchin porn or something. I left the club around 12:30am (early huh?) and called it a nite.

Time to enjoy the rest of my weekend.

Lucky 8

2 mundane jobs and 7 ad agencies later, I will be calling Batey / Red Cell my home.

[insert happy sigh]

Explanation

I apologize for the "fool me once" post. I should be more descriptive.

A couple of months ago, I had an interview with PR agency. During the phone interview, I had specifically told the person I was not particularly fluent in Mandarin--especially reading and writing. She told me it wasn't a problem and that I should still come in for the interview. Turns out it was a problem--not a minor problem, but a MAJOR problem. The PR director was nice enough to tell me that PR agencies in Taiwan use mostly Chinese to communicate with vendors/media and that the chances of me landing a job in PR was next to nothing. Lesson learned.

Last week, another PR agency called and asked me to come in for an interview. I was very straight up with him about my lack of Chinese and he said it wasn't a problem. *insert deja vu* So against my better judgment, I still went. After filling out a brief application form, I was told that I wasn't qualified for the job. WTF?

Retards, I tell ya. Fuckin retards.

Ghost Town

ty phoon: A tropical cyclone occurring in the western Pacific or Indian oceans.

A typhoon swept through Taiwan yesterday/today. It wasn't my first encounter with one, but nevertheless it was a bit scary at times. Once the news gave out warnings, people flocked to grocery stores and stocked up on rice, instant noodles and other necessasities. Businesses piled sand bags in front of their stores to prevent flooding and most windows were taped with the letter [x] to prevent them from shattering from the massive winds.

The winds and rain were the most relentless at 4am. The constant howling of the wind was a sure sign I would not get a good nite's sleep. One comedic moment came around 3am when I noticed the air con was leaking water. I instantly grabbed a pad and taped it against the air con to prevent future leaks. I felt like McGyver, but it didn't work entirely b/c I had to change the pad a couple of hours later. ^__^

When the sun rose and winds died down, I took the bus to my friends' apt to use the internet. Enroute, I noticed scooters tipped over from the wind, trees uprooted and the eerieness of the lack of people not roaming the streets.

As I continued to watch the news (I heard that the typhoon had not passed!) a report came on that I thought was smart as hell! A GUCCI store was robbed at 5am and an estimated 2 million NT worth of bags/merchandise was stolen. The store security tapes stopped recording at 3am and with the added typhoon, it was literally the perfect moment to rob a store! Of course I don't encourage stealing, but it was the perfect crime at the perfect time! Kudo's to them~

------------------------------

Hey Astri, lookin forward to the day of movies, mah jong and kareoke!

Double Take

I was riding down Ho Ping E. Rd yesterday and almost got into an accident b/c I thought I saw Astri! But it was actually the new singer, Rebecca and her entourage. How crazy is that? I didn't mean to stare, but I think she caught me staring at her for that brief .03 seconds. If I had her album, I would've stopped and gotten her autograph. Oh well, its not like she's super duper famous.

For some odd reason, I've been waking up at 6am this past week. It's been hell on my body b/c I try to sleep again, but I just get even more tired later in the day. And there's no point for me to wake up at 6. I think my body sub consciously thinks I have a job but no, I really don't. I guess when I start working, I won't have to adjust. Wow, my body is actually thinking ahead!

Fool me once, shame on you.
Fool me twice, shame on me.
Fool me twrice, shame on the both of us.

There won't be a 3rd time. Fuckin retards~

Edumacation

I was crusing a teaching job posting site and the name of this place was just too funny! It took me a second or two to understand.

AGKsion Language School.

hmm--yes, 'education' is very important. I wonder if they can make that into a t-shirt...

Breaking News

One of the few pleasures I have everyday when I turn on my computer is reading my friend's blogs. More specifically, I read Astri's blog b/c she has the decency to update it daily--for that, I salute you!

I absolutely hate watching the news in Taiwan b/c its very repetitive and the news topics always leave me with this thought: oh my god~

There was a story on a security guards dormitory and how his bunk gave him wet dreams every night. Other guards didn't believe him and when they slept on his bunk, they too had wet dreams. Sick~

Then there was the story of a family that adopted a scruffy, beat up dog. When the reporters asked them how the dog was doing now, they said "Oh, we washed the dog and now he doesn't look scruffy or beat up." @;@"

Recently a Taiwanese model/actress came out to reporters that her husband of 8 months had frequently beat her. In an attempt to save her and their 4 month old son, she figured the only way out was to hold a press conference. This has been the 'hot topic' this past week. So hot, that the news anchor held off the London bombing news to show the news of an abused wife.

Gee, I didn't know an abused wife story that's been going on for at least 4 days held more importance than breaking news on terrorism. Pretty fucked up if you ask me.

Cockroaches vs Mosquitos

Sorry my title sounds like a low-budget horror flick.

I have a bone to pick with the creator of cockroaches and mosquitos. I mean, COME ON NOW! What good are they to society? Why aren't they extinct? It's not like we can eat them (except for the poor souls that do on Fear Factor) or that they're full of nutrients.

Okay, some might say that even though we, humans do not eat them, other creatures do. I believe rats and other bigger insects feed off of them. Not that I'm an anti-advocate for animal rights, but I'm positive I won't lose sleep if we lived in a world without rats, spiders, insects and other diesease carrying creatures. The whole circle of life/food chain theory is just over rated.

I say bring back the saber tooth tiger, wooly mammoth and do-do birds and drive these baterica-carrying insects to extinction! At least the shit from those animals can help fertalize the Earth.

Who's with me?

70% Fobulous

You know you're turning into a 100% bonafide fob when you start collecting Hello Kitty magnets...

The lastest fad in Taiwan are these mini Hello Kitty magnets. You can only get them at 7-11 (by purchasing 77NT or more) and there's 30 of them to celebrate 30 years of Hello Kitty mania. I initially started collecting them to give to my godmom's daughter, but since she got all 30 of them, I'm starting to collect them as well! They're useful!

I don't think I have the strength to collect all 30, but it would be nice. I think I have 8 so far.

Anyway-- out of the blue, Kieran messenges me and he's coming back to Taiwan! Whoo-hoo! I told Alice that I was the glue that held everyone together (I think I say that a lot). She just laughed in my face. Whatever, I like to think its true.

Oh, I met up with Josh and Timmy today. They bought a basketball at Xi Men Ding and we played ball at Sun Yat Sen Memorial Hall. It was fun, hot and exhausting. Too bad Josh is leaving tomorrow--no more ball! =(

Sorry I was such a wet blanket Josh! I promise to take you out next time you're in town!!!